What kind of Ukulele Player are you?

So, I have some pretty strong opinions on this subject, so please forgive me if I offend.  I'm definitely getting grouchier as I age.  Anyway, for those who don't know I'm a fairly recent ukulele convert (last 5-6 years or so).  I've been playing bass and guitar since I was in the 7th grade, but I'm self-taught.  So, my style is weird and I wouldn't say that I'm technically great, by any means.

However, I am a pretty decent bass player and I enjoy playing bass.  I also play my bass with my fingers and I have pretty strong opinions on that subject.  For example, I don't think slapping is ever okay and if you play with a pick then your tone better be super tough.  Well, I guess Flea gets a pass, but that's about it.  And, by tough, on the picking style, I mean like Kim Gordon, Brian Ritchie or Kim Deal tough.  Not Nu Metal tough.

So, being a bass player first, I actually play guitar like a bass.  That is to say, I don't use a pick.  I strum with my fingers and I play single notes by plucking with my fingers.  It's weird, but I've been doing it for too long to go back.  Anyway, I'm just giving you some information so you can put the rest of my crazy rant into context.


1) I distrust attractive musicians.  To me, music is what you get into if you are sort of weird and goofy looking, yet you still want to meet girls (or boys, or whathaveya).  Attractive people don't need the extra help.  This is our thing!  Go back to writing bad poetry and modeling.  For example, when I first heard The Apples in Stereo, I envisioned them as a bunch of really pretty boys and I hated them.  Then I saw a picture of the band (cause they are pretty goofy looking) and I fell head-over-heels in love.

2) I value honesty and enthusiasm over competency and technique any day.  So, while I appreciate someone who is incredibly skilled, like Jake Shimabukuro.  I would much rather see an awkward teenage kid play an original song on Youtube.  Two examples: The Robot Song by The Scribbles and Kazookeylele Version 2.  I'm not saying I want music to be played poorly, I'm just saying I appreciate original thought more.  Also, it's probably a sour grapes deal because, while I can write some goofy fun songs, I'll never be able to play like Jake Shimabukuro.

I thought I had another rant here, but I got distracted by a squirrel and lost my train of thought.  I guess what I'm saying is that I sort of believe that music should be fun.  Both for the listener and the performer.  Especially, if you are playing a ukulele.  I sort of frown on ukulele "shredding".  That's what guitars are for.   Again.. sour grapes, I guess.  What do y'all think?